‘Really loving is risking looking ugly when ugly is how it feels inside.’: Wife shares why it’s important to fight sometimes

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“He cleans the kitchen to avoid me.

I don’t mind because I’m avoiding him too and the kitchen gets cleaned. Silver linings.

Sometimes things will break under the weight of it all. Legs are going to shake.

What can I say? It takes a lot of work. It’s easy to be polite when that’s how you’re trained to be. But sometimes you have to fight.

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Sometimes you have to let it fly.

You have to let those ugly feelings turn into words that come out and you have to say what you need to say.

You have to meet in the middle.

You have to compromise, apologize, and you have to grow through what you go through.

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You have to have hard conversations.

Because loving someone, really LOVING them, is risking looking ugly when ugly is how it feels inside.

It’s permission to let it fly.

To be shaky, to be ugly, to be soft, to be real when it’s storming.

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To let go and learn from the bad times.

To challenge each other.

To grow together on merged time lines.

Both because of each other and in spite of each other.

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But nevertheless, together.

It’s understanding that just because you love each other doesn’t always mean you’ll like each other.

So let it fly and get that kitchen clean. Take time away and take the time to talk.

They don’t promise you it’s easy, they just promise you it’s worth it.

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And I really think it is.”

husband and wife stand next to each other and look to one another
Courtesy of Wallflower Writing

This story was submitted to Love What Matters  by Wallflower Writing at Detroit Moms. You can follow her journey on Instagram and her websiteSubmit your own story here and be sure to subscribe to our free email newsletter for our best stories, and YouTube for our best videos.

Read more from Wallflower Writing here:

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