Photo courtesy of aniestla (via Unsplash).
Disclaimer: This story contains details of emotional and physical dating violence that may be upsetting to some.
“Will Smith was recently quoted to say, ‘Love will make you do crazy things.’
I want to take a second and share something with all of you.
The internet is losing it. Blowing up. Just exploding over what happened at the Oscars last night.
I heard the speech Will Smith gave, and to be honest, that was the only part that I have stuck in my head.
Way before I was married.
Way before I had kids.
Way before I shared my life online.
I was seeing someone.
Someone who justified every action of violence they showed in this world as love for me.
I was mortified at the situations that would unfold.
Someone who justified the crazy behaviors and outrageous outbursts in public as love for me.
I was embarrassed and humiliated 98% of the time.
That his love was so strong for me that all common sense and decency left him constantly.
Showing love was always violence towards others who may jeopardize our relationship or anyone who was a threat to him getting too close to me.
That type of love is dangerous.
That is my opinion.
And you can disagree.
That type of love is toxic.
That is my opinion.
And you can disagree.
Love can make you do crazy things.
But violence should never be encouraged as a symbol of love or a justified reason.
Some of you will say that Will Smith was defending his wife’s honor.
But did that require violence?
What happened to using our words?
What happened to acting like adults?
I feel as though it could have been handled better.
Maybe you think it was handled perfectly.
Let’s agree to disagree.
But, to be honest, every time I hear someone say it’s because of love…
I find myself thinking back to when some of the most violent things have happened in front of me or to me.
You can love someone without violence.
You can always defend someone you love.
You can make a choice to not have a crazy moment in the name of love.
Love should never make you hurt another human being.
I remember like it was yesterday saying to the man I was in a relationship with many moons ago, ‘If your love for me makes you do these types of crazy things, I don’t want your love.’
Love can make you want to do crazy things, but it doesn’t mean you should ever do them.”
This story was submitted to Love What Matters by Katie Emde of Journey for Avery. Submit your own story here and be sure to subscribe to our free email newsletter for our best stories, and YouTube for our best videos.
Read more stories from Katie here:
To My Abusive Parents: Because Of You, I Will Live Life With An Abundance Of Love
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