Only 1 Child Appears In This Photo, But I Am A Mother Of 3

More Stories like:

โ€œI am 1 in 4. With a quick glance, you see a special bond between a mother and her daughter. Happiness shines as a precious little girl kisses her โ€˜mommy.โ€™ But this picture-perfect moment is far from perfect.

Only 1 child appears in this photo, but I am a mother to 3 childrenโ€ฆ 1 triplet on earth, and 2 in heaven.

What you donโ€™t see in this photo is the pain. The physical pain and heartache as doctors told me my daughter was born too weak to survive. The pain of holding my firstborn child, knowing that her time on earth is limited. The pain as she takes her final breath, knowing a little piece of me also died that day. The pain of planning a funeral, instead of decorating a nursery. The pain of doing it all over again, two months later after our second child passed away. The pain that lingers, years after that final goodbye.

Grief never goes away. At first, it feels as if your world is crumbling. There are days your body refuses to get out of bed, the grief weighing you down in ways you never imagined. There will always be a piece of my heart shattered without two of my triplets. But over time, I have learned how to manage the grief, even tuck that pain away, so itโ€™s not visible on the surface.

Advertisement

Because thatโ€™s what society expects us to do.

People donโ€™t want to see me cry. Many people donโ€™t even want to acknowledge a loss. For decades, pregnancy and child loss has been a taboo topic, something that makes people cringe and uncomfortable. It brings out a familiar face when you mention child and death, a look of sympathy, but also pity, because people canโ€™t fathom losing a child.

But, hereโ€™s the thingโ€“chances are someone you know has experienced a loss. Maybe itโ€™s a friend or neighbor. Maybe itโ€™s your childโ€™s teacher. Maybe itโ€™s the woman you watch on the news.

1 in 4 women experience a lossโ€“whether it be through miscarriage, stillbirth or infant loss.

Advertisement

As you look at this picture, you see a loving moment between a mother and daughter, but what you donโ€™t see is the special bond that child shares with her siblings. That necklace my daughter is admiring holds the initials of her siblings, Parker and Abby. She may not get to play with them at home, or walk side-by-side with them at school, but she knows all about her brother and sister. My daughter talks about her siblings in Heaven and sheโ€™s not shy to share when someone asks her if sheโ€™s an only child. My daughter is a triplet and always will be. And we see a little piece of all 3 of them within her. They will always be part of our lives.

You may only see 1 child with me, but I am the mother of 3 beautiful triplets. You may see tears and sometimes pain, but the grief has made me stronger. My children made me who I am today. I am more patient, compassionate and I wear my heart on my sleeve. My children have taught me to live each day to the fullest, for you never know what tomorrow may bring.

I am a mother to children both on earth and in Heaven. I am 1 in 4. And I am not alone.โ€

Mother who lost her first two kids smiles as she holds her third daughter
Courtesy of Stacey Skrysak

This story was written by Stacey Skrysak, an award winning television journalist based in Illinois. Subscribe to our free email newsletter, Living Betterโ€”your ultimate guide for actionable insights, evidence backed advice, and captivating personal stories, propelling you forward to living a more fulfilling life.

Advertisement

Provide comfort for someone struggling. SHARE this story on Facebook with your friends and family.

Subscribe to our Living Better newsletter.

Your ultimate guide for actionable insights, evidence-backed advice, and captivating personal stories propelling you towards a more fulfilling life.

    โ€‹

     Share  Tweet
    Logo

    Looks like your ad blocker is on.

    ร—

    We rely on ads to keep creating quality content for you to enjoy for free.

    Please support our site by disabling your ad blocker.

    Continue without supporting us

    Choose your Ad Blocker

    • Adblock Plus
    • Adblock
    • Adguard
    • Ad Remover
    • Brave
    • Ghostery
    • uBlock Origin
    • uBlock
    • UltraBlock
    • Other
    1. In the extension bar, click the AdBlock Plus icon
    2. Click the large blue toggle for this website
    3. Click refresh
    1. In the extension bar, click the AdBlock icon
    2. Under "Pause on this site" click "Always"
    1. In the extension bar, click on the Adguard icon
    2. Click on the large green toggle for this website
    1. In the extension bar, click on the Ad Remover icon
    2. Click "Disable on This Website"
    1. In the extension bar, click on the orange lion icon
    2. Click the toggle on the top right, shifting from "Up" to "Down"
    1. In the extension bar, click on the Ghostery icon
    2. Click the "Anti-Tracking" shield so it says "Off"
    3. Click the "Ad-Blocking" stop sign so it says "Off"
    4. Refresh the page
    1. In the extension bar, click on the uBlock Origin icon
    2. Click on the big, blue power button
    3. Refresh the page
    1. In the extension bar, click on the uBlock icon
    2. Click on the big, blue power button
    3. Refresh the page
    1. In the extension bar, click on the UltraBlock icon
    2. Check the "Disable UltraBlock" checkbox
    1. Please disable your Ad Blocker
    2. Disable any DNS blocking tools such as AdGuardDNS or NextDNS

    If the prompt is still appearing, please disable any tools or services you are using that block internet ads (e.g. DNS Servers).