“Dear mom in the café,
The other day, I sat in that lovely little café with a friend. This is where I saw you and your son. It was the first time I had gotten out in a while and was able to have an adult conversation with my friend without being interrupted.
As we sat and sipped and chatted about the things on our hearts, I could see your son out of the corner of my eye. He was climbing on things that weren’t meant for climbing and trying to spin the hands on the giant decorative clock just for fun. He was so cute.
Still chatting with my friend while smiling at him, you came and did your best to try to keep him from breaking something, or worse yet, disturbing us.
As you chased after him scooting around the room, in his own little world of fun and exploration, I could tell by your body language you were embarrassed and were tired of fighting him.
You apologized more than once to my friend and I as he played near our table without regard to your telling him to stop or come here.
Honestly, I have to say, thank you so much for the apology. It shows you are a considerate person. But really, neither of us minded your son’s behavior one little bit.
He is just a little boy who no one expects to behave like an adult, and you are a sweet mom who needs to know you and your son are not a bother.
I could see your frustration as he refused to come to you after you called him. I could see him peeking through his hands at you while keeping his feet firmly planted on the stairs he really wanted to climb. I had to smile.
I smiled not because I was trying to be nice and make you feel better — although a part of me was — but mostly I smiled because I truly could see my own children and myself in this situation playing out in front of us.
So dear mom in the café, you need to know…
You and your son are not a bother because…
He reminds me of my own little boy who I am glad I got away from for a few hours, but who my heart misses just a little.
You and your son are not a bother because…
I am very used to noise all around me. While the noise in my house sometimes bothers me, you and your son are not bothering me today. Instead, you are a beautiful reminder of my own beautiful family chaos at home.
You and your son are not a bother because…
I can see myself in you. You are clearly a good mom. I can tell by the way your son is ignoring your requests but keeping one eye on you to see how you are going to respond. He loves you. And I needed this reminder kids don’t usually disobey to make their moms upset. Watching your son makes me realize kids are usually very much in their own innocent and fun-filled worlds that haven’t yet been infused with worries over the shoulds and shouldn’ts of life.
So please, dear mom, know you are not a bother.
In fact, it may have been good for us to see another mom’s struggles, in order to help us feel a bit better about our own. Trust me, we struggle with our kids sometimes, just like you were struggling then. It made my heart feel just a little lighter knowing I am not alone on this motherhood journey.
Most moms have a place in their heart that is so graceful towards other moms’ kids, especially in public when we can tell that mom is embarrassed and struggling.
Being a mom is more than just raising your kids in your own home. It’s going out into the world with your kids and exposing the good and the bad behaviors that our families have. Being a mom is relying on our tribe for support.
I will be a temporary tribe member of every mom I come across, in any café I am ever in. I will do this because of the power of my attitude and words as a mom have the power to transform another mom for the better.”
This story was submitted to Love What Matters by Amber Prohaska. Do you have a similar experience? We’d like to hear your important journey. Submit your own story here. Be sure to subscribe to our free email newsletter for our best stories, and YouTube for our best videos.
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