“She wanted you to come home to girl on the right. But no bueno. That crap, it didn’t fly.”
‘My husband used to come home to find the girl on the right. A little rouge, a pretty top, a sexy bra. This girl on the right was sassy. This girl on the right was F-U-N.’
How A Pool Party Landed Me In Labor & Delivery
“Maybe it was from the enormous pressure the slinglet put on my lady bits… maybe it was tacos… the world will never know.”
The One Thing Every Mom Needs Is Mom Friends
“WOMEN NEED friends who can pig out on a big piece of cake and tell each other inappropriate jokes. That can grab our little cherubs and have a massive sleepover, binge watching TV shows with wine. Hands up if this is what you need.”
‘I didn’t love my daughter at first sight. I look at that picture and cringe. I just wanted to be left alone. I felt so heartless.’: Mom describes battle with postpartum depression
“There the nurse was, taking this baby’s head and shoving it into my boob to start breastfeeding. ‘She’s your baby!’ I would tell myself, ‘just bond with her.’ I’ve made a huge mistake here.”
‘Fire burned in my eyes. He backed away. I pointed to the sink. ‘Oh yeah, I cleaned out my room.’ My eyes bulged.’: Mom hilariously recalls the joys of parenting
“‘WHYARETHEDISHESNOTINTHEDISHWASHER?’ Yes, I said it like it was all one word. ‘I dunno.’ My blood pressure shot to unsafe levels. Seventeen, yes, 17 cups in the damn sink. Not one. Not 5. Seven-fricking-teen.”
My Daughter Is My Best Friend, And I’m Not Ashamed To Admit It
“I’m well aware that many parenting experts and the majority of the general public think it not wise to be your child’s friend. ‘You are their parent, not their friend,’ they say. What do I tell them? Nothing, because I don’t need them to approve of my parenting decisions.”
‘Can I murder the baby now?’ My first day back to work from maternity leave, I got a text.’: 3-month-old shaken baby survives ‘extensive’ brain damage
“I called his father. ‘What happened?’ He didn’t have much to say. I choked down tears and made my way to the hospital. After x-rays, I was told they suspected child abuse. My baby was bleeding in his brain due to non-accidental trauma. I immediately went to his father. ‘How could this happen?!’ He just kept repeating, ‘He was choking on milk.’ I was enraged.”
10 Things People Need To STOP Asking Twin Parents
“My rolling circus attracts the attention of every rando in the tampon aisle. This party on wheels, I’ve found, invites a menagerie of questions about my sons’ multiplicity…”
‘I knew why they were there. Our child appeared on the screen, only this time something was different.’: Wife documents ups and downs of infertility journey
“Someone once explained fertility to me and compared the journey to a tunnel. Some tunnels are short, and some tunnels are long. But at the end of every tunnel, there is a light.”
‘Hi, my name is Mom. I feel like a ghost walking through the aisles, completely unseen and unheard. I roam around lost secretly hoping someone will ask me if I need help just so I can interact with them.’
“My girlfriends still call, most of them don’t have kids yet. I try to be the old me, the one with a name. I’m getting tugged on, sucked on, and yelled at while trying to listen to their weekend plans. I remember those. I beg them to keep asking me to hang out even though I know I won’t be able to come. Hi, my name is Mom.”