“‘I’m sorry, but we found a mass in your daughter’s brain.’ I thought that would be the worst day of my life. Little did I know, only 13 days later, THAT would actually be the worst day of my life. In a different ER, a few floors below from where my daughter was, another doctor pulled a different curtain, looked at my husband and me, and said, ‘I’m sorry.’ Time stopped at that moment.”
“I learned to compete, not with the girl standing next to me, but with the girl I used to be. I learned that strong women stumble, and even stronger women ask for help when they need it. I learned that worry doesn’t change anything, except my level of energy.”
“We didn’t know how hard it would be on my body. And what if I got pregnant with twins? That would make an already high risk pregnancy, that much more high risk.”
“‘I want to build us a van to live in. We can show our kid the world.’ I wish I remembered exactly what he said—I was rage-deaf by that point. It was the moment I knew we weren’t going to raise this baby.”
“I was about to get in the shower when the phone rang. Surprised, as it was around 7:45 a.m., I stared at my mother-in-law’s name on the screen. My heart sank. He had left me a few voicemails a few days prior.”
“She ended up getting remarried, and never told her husband about me. When she changed her mind, she met us in secret.”
“’Hear me out, before you say anything.’ Those are the first words I heard. ‘It’s a girl. She’s due next month.’ I could barely speak. Our hearts ached for her, we stood there sobbing because this strong, smart, selfless birth mother’s deepest grief would be our greatest joy. Our daughter’s maternal grandma brought us both close in a warm hug. She whispered, ‘Go get your daughter,’ before she left.”
“I collapsed in the middle of the backyard. My face buried in the grass, which Scott took so much pride in maintaining, everything on me curled up. A single thought floated to my mind. Our kids. And I stood up.”
“The life I imagined crashed before me and fell to pieces. The sadness consumed me like an angry fire I couldn’t put out. I heard the words, ‘She has characteristics of Down syndrome.’ But then, I saw my daughter with her big marble colored eyes and blonde hair. Finally, I embraced it.”
“It keeps me lying awake at night, tears and stress making my heart race. I’m drowning in medical debt. And I know I’m not alone.”
