‘I read somewhere a baby boom is expected. A baby boom? How are y’all having sex with all of these kids around all day?’: Mom shares candid reality of first days of coronavirus pandemic

“It’s only day one, y’all.

Like so many parents out there, I have shared the websites offering free curriculum and free meals.

I saved the sample daily planner and made changes to accommodate our family.

I felt a rising panic all weekend as I tried to figure out how to roll with these unthinkable circumstances.

Today was GO!

The morning went just fine, but right after lunch the anger started erupting. My teenagers are having a hard time understanding that this is not ‘vacation’ time. None of the house weekend rules or summer break rules apply here. There is still Algebra 2 and Geometry that must be learned in order to be ready for next year. Chemistry is not going away. While the littles see this as an adventure, the bigs see it as some kind of punishment.

Just to be clear; no one is excited about this drastic change of plans.

No one wanted their routines thrown out the window.

I, personally, never wished to be a home-school mom. I am unprepared. I am scared. I am uncertain. I am armed only with a few free websites and a reasonable-looking daily schedule.

I read somewhere that a baby boom is expected. A baby boom? How are y’all having sex with all of these kids around all day? I tried to take a shower and my home went into utter chaos complete with instant conspiracy theories on my where-a-bouts. One child hypothesized that I was hiding in my truck in the garage. I was aghast, but only because I didn’t think of it first. Eff the baby boom, we are not going to be playing any adult games for a loooong time around here.

I keep seeing people talk about the herds of hoarders. Just to be clear, angry woman ahead of me in the check-out line, I have a family of 6. I typically have TWO full carts of food. As we are just playing things week by week here, you get to see what shopping ‘light’ looks like. Also, mind your own. You aren’t the census lady. You don’t know how many people everyone is feeding. Let us have a little more grace.

Anxious, fighting teenagers. Confused littles. Conspiracy showers. Sexless life. Angry strangers evaluating at my cart. Day one, y’all. This is day one.”

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