LJ Herman

LJ Herman is a former editor at Love What Matters and lives in Colorado. LJ is a concert, ticket and technology enthusiast. He has seen the Dave Mathews Band over one hundred times and counting.

‘This is what my house looked like for 3 weeks. This is depression.’: Woman explains why depression ‘isn’t you,’ claims there’s ‘light at the end of the tunnel, even if your brain tells you there’s not’

“I had no motivation to brush my teeth, shower. No motivation to play with my kids. I was anxious my husband was going to leave for someone better who had their stuff together. It was me sitting on the couch responding to messages of ‘How are you doing?’ and replying ‘really good’ knowing it was a lie. You need a friend that doesn’t care if your house is a mess because you need to clean your mind before your house. And you need that friend to be you.”

group of 5 siblings together holding onto one another

Dear Last Born Child, I’m Sorry For Bringing My B-Game

“There was a time when bedtimes were enforced, when we didn’t allow PB&J as an alternate dinner option every night, and when all movies shown were G-rated. You don’t know what you’re missing because those parents left the building two kids ago.”

‘You now have a high-risk pregnancy.’ I cut her off mid-sentence. ‘Am I high risk, or is my baby high risk?’: Mom receives extremely rare SUA diagnosis 20 weeks into pregnancy

“’Our baby is high risk! My poor husband is used to me being a bit dramatic, but he stayed calm even in this situation, asking me to repeat our diagnosis. ‘SUA, Single Umbilical Artery.’ They said she’ll be small… that’s all I could focus on – she was going to come early.”

‘My best friend was supposed to marry her soulmate. Instead, she spoke her vows at his funeral.’: Woman loses fiancé to ‘work accident’ before wedding, creates touching hashtag to ‘honor’ their love

“It was later on, after an ‘accidental Facebook message’ to the ‘wrong Danny’ that fate would bring them together. 107 days before what was supposed to be the happiest day of her life, her wedding day, she got the most heart-stopping phone call. Her fiancé was in an accident. One he wouldn’t make it out alive from.”

‘I’m sorry. Eva won’t make it.’ I sat, waiting for the doctors to stop the bleeding in her brain. The damage was too extensive.’: Mom pens letter to past self 13 months after daughter dies of Immune Thrombocytopenic Purpura

“You need to listen to the doctors. You need to breathe. Right now, you can’t see past those hospital walls. One day you will. One day you’ll see the beauty in all they did for your baby girl. One day you’ll be forgive the neurosurgeon who you found so blunt and cold. One day you will be thankful Eva was in your arms, and not on an operating table, when that last breath came.”

‘My boys asked me to build a fort. Seriously, it was amazing. Until they asked me to spend the night with them.’: Mom learns to accept all the things she ‘just can’t do anymore’

“I did it. I obliged. I smiled and pretended to have fun. I slept in that teeny tiny space. But I paid for it the next morning. Boy, did I ever. Y’all. I can’t do that anymore. I’m too old, or too grouchy, or too in-love with sleep. Whichever it may be, I just can’t do that anymore. I’d give just about anything for my 16-year-old body again.”

‘All four legs collapsed. The second turn to look, I saw him seizing. I was in a state of shock.’: Golden Retriever dies suddenly due to suspected ‘blue algae neurotoxins’ in lake

“He looked at me like ‘but I don’t get it, momma, I’m okay. I’ll just get up.’ He collapsed again. I ran over to him, trying to give him water. Confused. Panicked. I didn’t know what was going on. Was he over heated? Dehydrated? I’m a nurse. Why didn’t I know?! Figure it out. Figure it out I kept telling myself. It took only ONE hour from the time we left the water for Oliver to breathe his last breath.”

‘He wasn’t walking or talking. I chalked it up to an overactive sister who adored getting everything for him. The pediatrician agreed, so I left.’: After autism diagnosis, Mom ‘mourns the loss of a son I never had, but will never stop fighting’

“I left the office with a smile on my face. I brought my son back to the car and teared up as I put him in. I refused to cry in front of him. I couldn’t show him I was scared. ‘Autism.’ As soon as they said it, my breath caught. I acted cool and collected. I acted like it was all to be expected. I acted. For everyone else’s benefit.”

‘I’m that bad mom at the playground looking at her phone. You assume I’m on social media. Nope, I’m working!’: Mom’s immense guilt over being a ‘stay-at-home-working-mom’ despite others thinking it’s a ‘perfect situation’

“The best time of day is coming. Nap time! Except this doesn’t mean relax, shower, or nap. It means a precious 2-3 hours of work! This is when my time clock actually starts. I race to my computer to pick up where I left off, hoping the toddler won’t take a short nap and completely ruin the day.”

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